Cooking Up a Healthy Relationship: 5 Base Ingredients

by Relationship Coach Rinatta Paries on November 22, 2015

in Articles, Break-ups and Divorce, Dating, Heartbreak, Marriage, Men's Help, Relationships, Singles, Singles, Women's Help

cooking up healthy relationshipYour relationship should be a source of joy for your life, a safe zone that helps you handle uncertainties and stresses of life.

Yet, even though people are trying harder to make relationships work, for many men and women, relationships are still a source of pain and confusion.

Let’s remedy this by going back to the basics and understanding the foundation of what makes for a healthy, happy relationship.

Below is a list of 5 foundational ingredients necessary for a good relationship.

Think of this list as a base recipe. Once you have the base, you can flavor in any way you would like, creating a relationship that best reflects the two of you. Just be sure to remember that the base ingredients are critical if you want to create a healthy, happy relationship foundation.

5 Foundational Ingredients Necessary for a Healthy Relationship:

1. Security, Stability, Commitment, Honesty
There simply is no solid, healthy relationship without these four factors. There may be love and chemistry, but this is not enough. In order to feel safe and trust your partner, which is foundational to a healthy relationship, these four factors have to be present.

2. Good Communication and Kindness
You need to be able to speak your mind, give and receive kindness, and have each other’s back in most cases. Without this, you can still have love and chemistry, but you will not be able to feel settled and consistently happy in your relationship.

3. Understanding
In order for partners to be able to bond and feel secure, there must be caring about each other’s agenda, communicated on a regular basis. The experience of being heard, understood and cared about needs to be common place in your relationship.

4. Physical Intimacy
It’s not possible to have a happy, healthy relationship without physical intimacy that is satisfying to both partners. The only exception to this is for couples who agree at the outset that physical intimacy is not important to either one of them. Struggle in this area means the three areas above are not solidly set in the relationship.

5. Novelty, Joy, Engagement, Fun
The couple should be able to share activities, hobbies or lifestyle together that brings each of them enjoyment. This is an issue for many couples, as the lack in the first three areas may contribute to a lack of desire to connect and enjoy life together.

What to do if your relationship is missing one or more of these ingredients:
If your relationship is missing key ingredients on this list, you are likely struggling in it. You may find yourself vacillating, wanting the relationship to work, yet being frustrated or sad with what’s missing. Even if your partner is unwilling to do the work of improving the relationship, you can still make it better on your own. Start to shift it in a healthy direction by working on your part in the relationship dance.

What to do if you are single:
When you are looking for a potential partner, be sure you are looking for a person who is capable of creating a relationship with these 5 essential ingredients. Not everyone is going to be able or willing, or even consider these important in a relationship. Learn to slow down in the process of dating, ask the right questions, and make good decisions about who is the right fit for you.

Missing some of the ingredients for a healthy relationship, and not sure how to create change? Schedule a Get Clarity Coaching session and together we will identify your specific best steps to cooking up a healthy, joyful relationship!


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